Wordless Wednesday

August 18, 2010 § 2 Comments

Trying Again

August 18, 2010 § 2 Comments

A photo of a cup of coffee.
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Again, it has been simply ages since I wrote a really meaningful post on this blog.  I have been a bit distracted by the daily goings on in my little corner of the world.  I shall attempt to recount the past few weeks backwards since it is fresher in my head.

It is 5:22 am, I am in my pajamas with a lovely, steaming hot, mug of Tim Horton‘s coffee next to me.  That to me, is a good start to any day.  The Twinkies both have some kind of sinus thing going on.  They are little rivers of mucus and due to that, they are not sleeping well, and are in turn, cranky little monsters.  Meltdowns here, meltdowns there, meltdowns pretty much everywhere.

I had to cancel  the boy’s first speech therapy yesterday since I’m the kind of mother that doesn’t feel like sharing the germs with every other kid in the area.  It is pretty frustrating since he had only had 2 occupational therapy sessions (before the therapist went on vacation), has had about 6 sessions with his special services teacher, whom I adore, but who will be….you guessed it, going on vacation, and no speech therapy since the therapist was ON vacation.  It has been pretty frustrating since they all seem to think that 1 pm is a good time to come over….you know, 1 pm…..NAPTIME!   So we have to roll with the punches.  It is only until October 15th…..and it is through the “Easter Seals” (which I will admit, up until now…I really had no idea what they really did)….and is not costing us anything ( one of the perks of being a Montgomery county PA resident)  And today, we have the boy’s evaluation on the Montgomery County Intermediate Unit.  DH will meet me at my parent’s house, where we will drop off the girl, and then head over with the boy.  DH then has to go back to work (which he has been doing an extraordinary amount of lately, leaving me to feel much like the single mama).  It is going to be a long day around here.

He seems to be responding with some slight improvement.  He is still biting his wrists when he gets frustrated or angry or is looking for attention.  I am supposed to put the wrist at his side and do something with him that he likes, or give him a toy that he likes, which is so easy whilst potty training his sister (OOOOOhhhhh she is a stubborn one!).  It is pretty much a circus around here.  Global Developmental Delays…..three very scary words in my world.

I was very saddened to get news from for friend, Janet that she lost her 23 year old son to an overdose.  It simply broke my heart.  I will never understand why tragic things happen to good people.  23 is too young.  He hadn’t even begun to see the world.  My prayers are with the family and will be for a long time.

I haven’t vacuumed my house in 2 weeks after discovering that my DH discarded the vacuum filter when he emptied the collection container.  If you vacuum now, all you get is a nice little clogged bunch of dog hair and junk that isn’t so pretty and is spewing all kinds of fun stuff in the air.  So, in a day or two, my E-Bay find should arrive and I can properly clean my house like the little frigging domestic princess that I have become (please note very, very heavy sarcasm).  I was so tempted to buy a roomba robot vacuum, but I am sure the kids and the dogs would not like it as much as me.  And the boy, with his sensory issues, cannot stand the sound of the vacuum….that means, vacuum during nap time or after kids go to bed…..because I just have a ton of energy them  (again…note use of sarcasm)

Let’s see, what else…. Oh, we had another date night.  Mom and Dad had been on vacation in Maine for 2 1/2 weeks, so there was really no going out or doing anything.  So the Twinkies stayed overnight with Grandma and Grandpa while we went out for date night.  And there was still nothing going on, if you are hearing me, ladies……ahem.  Sigh…..good thing we aren’t having more kids…..because it would be immaculate conception…….

My days are filled with playing with the kids, occasionally feeling brave enough to take them both to the store (which gets really expensive since they each want to hold on of everything I buy).

My now 96 year old Grandmother is “Connie in Wonderland” and is fading away on us ( dementia, Alzheimer’s, leukemia, etc. etc. etc).  I don’t like to see here like this.  I would just rather remember the idea of her since when I was growing up, she was just a name who lived on the other side of the country, who would send presents at Christmas time and for my birthday.  We butted heads when I was younger and I think she enjoys the company of my sister far more than she does mine.  And 96….yeah, I really don’t want to live to be 96 and have to be in a diaper, out live 2 of my children and most of my friends, and sit in a diaper all day.  Yeah, not so much.

And in dealing with all of this, I have had headaches….bad ones.  Apparently, I have been grinding my teeth, which in turn, has been wreaking havoc on my temporomandibular joint (TMJ).  So I broke down and bought a mouth guard, like I used in high school sports, molded it to my teeth and now sleep with this horrible blue piece of whatever it is in my mouth…..very attractive……TMJ sucks…my jaw pops, my jaw gets stuck open, the muscles contract and give me a headache nearly as bad as my migraines.  Not much fun.

But my head is above water (although I have gone back on my medicines for depression…I guess I jumped to gun on that little foray).  I have every intention of continuing to blog and to try to keep reading blogs as time allows.

Enhanced by ZemantaBut here is to life (as she raises her mug of coffee) and wishing you peace in your village……

Absence Explained

July 26, 2010 § 6 Comments

I have not been blogging, for a few reasons, some of which I am not going to post.  But primarily, because I have been trying to focus more on my son’s new issues.

Like most 2 year old boys, he has good days and not so good days.  He has tantrums.  He gets frustrated with his sister.  He wants, what he wants, when he wants.

We had some concerns because his “vocabulary” was not up to his sister’s level and had an appointment set up with our pediatrician back in February.  D suddenly seemed to be picking up new words and we decided to postpone his appointment.  But then, the more M picked up words and could express herself, the more frustrated that D got because he couldn’t.  He started biting himself, banging his head, and being very aggressive with me and with M.

So, we went to the pediatrician, who referred us to the Intermediate Unit’s Early Intervention Unit to have D evaluated.

And the results were NOT what we were expecting.

At All!

In the five areas they evaluated, D scored at an 18 month level in three of the categories (Cognition, Speech, and Social).   They believe that D has “Global Developmental Delays”.  I don’t know why…I don’t know how…I don’t know when this happened.   I am scared to death of those three little words.  Was it due to his prematurity?  Was it due to the supplemental oxygen he received?  I am just trying to wrap my brain around it.   He will be seen by three different therapists weekly until his third birthday here at the house.  Then, we have to start the process all over again to transition him into the Intermediate Unit.  That process normally takes six to nine months.  So , we are already behind.  And that also means a lot of driving back and forth.

I am still waiting for the full report and I am very blessed that I have a very supportive group of Mommies who are keeping me strong and have given me some great insight.  I also happen to have two cousins who are both speech pathologists.  Talk about lucky me…..

So, if you are keeping track…..Infertility, Multiples, Prematurity,Postpartum Depression, and now Global Developmental Delays.  That’s the story of the last few years.  Throw in some very rocky moments in my marriage…I almost forgot…..Hubby and I have VERY different ideas about parenting and GDD.

D’s Occupational Therapist is coming this morning.  M will visit with our wonderful next door neighbor for the hour so that there is minimal distraction for D.  It is going to be a long and draining day…..

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O Coffee, My Coffee! ICLW day #5

June 25, 2010 § 3 Comments

Walt Whitman's use of free verse became apprec...
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So, it is date night….we are going out for Mexican food tonight.  Mom is coming over to watch the Twinkies.  It has been a while since we had a date night, so I am kind of looking forward to this one.  Some times, I think we all need to just separate Mommy and Daddy from the kids, so that Mommy and Daddy don’t get lost.  What do you do to make sure that you and yours stay connected?  I am always looking for ideas…..

And just because I am such a huge coffee buff….A very good friend of mine in the Great White North wrote this adaptation of Walt Whitman‘s O Captain! My Captain! For me this morning as an ode to that dark beverage that I so love.  Not really what I was planning on writing about on Day 5 of ICLW…but what the hay!

O coffee my coffee! your grateful drip is done,
The pot has weathered every drop, the prize we sought is won,
The mug is near, the water was clear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady pour, the kettle grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of brown,
Where on the counter my head lies,
Fallen sleepy and worn down.

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Holy Cow! It’s Thursday!

June 24, 2010 § 4 Comments


ICLW Day # 4….early in the morning, before it gets too hot, with her daughter in the booster seat eating Rice Krispies…




Holy Cow! It’s Thursday! When did that happen? Some weeks fly by and then other weeks…DRAG! Maybe it is because if it gets any hotter around here, people are just going to burst into flame. It has been 90+ for the last week. I am part iceberg…so you know I am not liking this. I just can’t wait to see my electric bill this much! Oh Goody!

Speaking of bills,..

I know that we struggled financially when we were TTC. I mean, I was spending $2k every month on injectables that I was getting from free.garage.sale.com (buying people’s left overs and what they couldn’t use if their cycle was cancelled) (How crazy was that…..think of the risks…..I wasn’t desperate for a baby, was I?)and that was just when we were doing IUI‘s. Then came the IVF….then after the failed IVF and my one rotten miserable (impenetrable) egg we had no choice but to move on to ICSI. Pricey pricey pricey! But you get so far and you are not just emotionally invested in the idea of a family, but also financially. I do not miss those days of pinching every stinking penny to make sure that we could try again.

But I digress….Remember a few weeks ago, I dropped a big ole 2x8x8 on my foot and went to the ER? Yeah….well, I got the bill yesterday. Yup…our portion is $900. Yup, for an hour and a half, 2 percocets and 3 x rays……and that amount doesn’t include the “professional” fee for the doctor who talked to me for 35 seconds. Maybe she is splitting it with the nurse in the black scrubs (what is the POINT of black scrubs? How do you know when they are DIRTY?) who was just so nice to me that I wanted to show her a neat trick I could do with my crutches (that I brought with me!!!). The trick goes something like this…..sit there and I will knock your head off your torso if you come near me again……. I called the insurance company….United Ripoff, I mean United Healthcare….and the claims rep explained it to me. I told her that next time I need to go to the ER, I am going to tell them I have no insurance….because it would be cheaper for me. Grrrr…..

We had a nice supper last night….boneless ribs and corn on the cob. I dipped mine into my favorite sauce…it is Aunt Caroline’s Dill Pickle BBQ sauce.  (check them out… this stuff is the bomb!) The kids are very much into eating whatever we are eating. Actually that is a lie. They could care less what I am eating. But, if its on Daddy’s plate….fogetaboutit! The poor man is going to wither into nothing at all……and he is skinny to begin with…..Oh to have that problem!!!

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You Like Me…..You Really Like Me!

June 23, 2010 § 8 Comments

I am sitting in my kitchen this morning…a little red-eyed. Sure…I an blame allergies or hay fever…but its really because last night I was up until (gasp!) almost Midnight! Dumb! Dumb! Dumb Mommy! Oh…and the Twinkies were up until 10 minutes until 10. Apparently, they wanted to watch Deadliest Catch too. How sad was that? Anybody watch?

So I am DELIGHTED!!!! I got 6, yes 6 comments yesterday! Woot! I love ICLW! I have rarely, in my 5 years of blogging got 6 comments in one day! I feel special! And loved! So THANK YOU!!!!

Today is not a typical day for me. My former employers (Dr. D & S) are coming over to check up and vaccinate the doggies. Yes, I have 3 doggies…did you know that? Like having twins isn’t enough chaos….. In all fairness…the doggies were here first….they are my furry little babies who wear fur coats and have speech impediments….oh, and they poop in the yard.

I love that Dr. D & S come right to my house. I love just hanging out with them. Sure, they were my employers, but after 3 and a half years, they became my friends first and employers second.

Mom is also bringing her doggie (Dot) over so it should pretty much be NUTS here this morning. And somehow, I managed to empty and load the dishwasher, clean the bathroom, feed the kids, drink coffee, and blog. Ah, the fine art of multitasking!

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Living the Proverb ICLW Day 2

June 22, 2010 § 6 Comments


Benjamin Franklin said “Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.”

OK…I am gonna go out on a limb here and paraphrase. “Early to bed, and early to rise, makes a MAMA2TWINS healthy, wealthy and wise….as long as she has good coffee in the house….otherwise….look out!”

Yesterday was the longest day of the year…and it seemed like the longest day of the year. Poor Little D got up at 4 am and only napped for 2 hours in the afternoon. Miss M…well, she rolls with the punches. As long as she has Nick Jr. and her blanket she can pretty much handle anything I throw at her. Her blanket is like my coffee…..

We ran yesterday. From suppertime to bedtime… we ran. We played, we danced, we clapped, we made sandcastles in the sandbox. We helped Daddy pour dirt. We got dirty. We got a boo-boo on our chubby little knee. But Daddy fixed it.

I’m healthy. I am off my PPD (Postpartum Depression)medicine, hopefully for good. I waned down the dose but have yet to actually inform my doctor of my decision to do so. I sought out help. Help I received. I am feeling better now and can cope without the assistance of modern pharmacology.

I am wealthy. I have everything I need and lots of stuff that in fact, I really don’t need (Ahem…there will be a garage sale mid July if you wanna swing by….Let’s Make A Deal, baby!) I am blessed to have my mother and father, my sister and brothers in law, my aunts, my uncle, my cousins, my nephews, my nieces….they all love me and the all love the babies. We don’t all live near each other, but come together when it is important. I love them dearly. Don’t get me wrong….am I still bummed about not getting to $40K job…..? you’re darn toot-in’ I am bummed. Could I have paid off everything we owe and then some with that money? heck yeah! Will I somehow muddle through? Yup. I’m tactical!

Wise? Who me? Not always, but I am a work in progress. I am slowly figuring out this how to be a mama…and in turn, how to be a MAMA2TWINS. Unless you do it on a daily basis or have done it…you don’t really understand the chaos. Please…mothers to higher order multiples…I have a ton of respect for what you do. It is just that when there are more than twins, it seems like it is socially acceptable to “get professional help”. You don’t really see a bunch of twin moms with au pairs and nannies. I am sure that they are out there…but it would not be my cup of tea. It would be like me cleaning the house because the maid was coming over….just makes no sense.

So…Welcome to Day 2 of ICLW week…..Get in, Sit Down, (I’m not gonna say “Shut Up”…I love comments too much) and Hold on!!!!

If you would not be forgotten
As soon as you are dead and rotten,
Either write things worthy reading,
Or do things worth the writing.

~Ben Franklin

Man!  He had some good ones! Peace in your village….mine is filled with crazy people…….

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